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2.11.2008

blind dating

So. Nikki and I have been doing a bit of church hopping lately. You know how it goes: You have a basic idea of what you are looking for in a church. You want the church to be charming, you want to have some good chemistry with the church, and you want it to feel natural. Pretty much, church hopping is like blind dating. You know a little bit about the church, but as you pull into the parking lot, you can't help but judge the church by how it looks. Is this a traditional church? Is is trendy or edgy? You had spent a lot of time getting ready, and you want so badly for the day to go well. You picked out the perfect outfit. You made sure your hair was just right. Your mind is racing. You start to feel a little self-conscious. Did I overdress? As you walk through the front door, you have no idea what to expect. Will they like me? You hope to yourself that if everything else falls through, that at the least the snacks will be worth showing up for. To avoid an awkward, shallow conversation with the greeter, you head straight for the snack table. After pounding down a few donut holes, you decide to head for an unclaimed pew with coffee in hand. The usher smiles, and you politely smile back. Deep down, you are wondering if someone can really be that happy to be handing out pastel-colored church picnic announcements. You could have spent several more minutes pondering this, but you are distracted by a smell. Now, let's be honest. Every church has a smell. It is usually something pleasant, but overpowering: potporri, a large, vanilla candle, or maybe some insense. Whatever the smell, you can be sure it was put there by some well-meaning old lady, and it definitely is not subtle. In spite of it all, you sit down in your pew, and you begin to look around. WHERE ARE ALL THE PEOPLE? You decide that you must have come on an 'off-night'. All of a sudden, a man begins to walk up to the podium. It's the pastor. You can't help but wonder, could he be the one?...

So, pretty much, we are still looking for a church. In other news, Nikki still has no friends in Colorado (except her 2nd graders), and really isn't trying that hard. She seems to be bonding with the 40-somethings who teach at her school. There could be something there. As for me, I keep on working too many hours at the office, while miraculously finding time to trade stocks online, risking money we can't afford to lose. Other than that, this is probably the last time I will ever write a blog, because it ended up pretty long, and only about one sixth as funny as it was in my head before I wrote it.

Peace and love,

Dave

8 comments:

DORRPOSTS said...

Hi, dear Dave! Please don't give up on doing blog entries - I thought your story was at least twice as funny as you thought it was! Keep searching for the "right" church for you - the Lord has a place for you guys. We love you and miss you so much, and our prayers are with you. ~ Mom

The Dorrs said...

Thanks for the laughs Dave. I assure you, it was funny.

We miss you guys.

-b

Chris and Sarah said...

Come to our new church! The pastor has earrings, nice tatoos, and I usually sit next to a homeless guy - and wonder what might be in his duffle bag. It's the real deal!

The Drakes said...

i experience the let down of idea into fruition a lot. but, i keep on posting. should i stop? are those the rules? church hopping IS like blind dating. hope you guys find one soon. -- jess

The Guy and Tiny Asian said...

nice one

The Lewis and Ruby Blog World said...

Have you ever been on a blind date?

The Dorrs said...

i'm blind.

Jake

Psyche!! I'm really not blind. But speaking of blind people, Beka and I were watching this home show on the ol' One-Eyed Babysitter. It was about a designer who was doing a remake of a living room for a family--only the husband and wife were both blind. Beka walks in and asks: "So I wonder how the reveal is gonna go down?"

The Drakes said...

Okay David, J and I have moved multiple times and have hopped on and off quite a few churches... Here is the deal, like you said, its just like dating, you gotta act like a total A-hole, like they owe you something. Wear crappy clothes, give limited info, or before you know it, you will be asked to do something like take offering. its terrible. If you act like you dont need them, they will fall all over you trying to get you to be their boyfriend (member). Have loads of fun. I know this response is quite late, but none-the-less I am sending it anyway. Also, I have been doing loads of running, last week I had a 50 mile total! I am training for a 50K at the end of May. The Willamette Invitational is next weekend and it makes me think of going to watch you! Talk to you later. Cheers, Kurtis